Did she know?

I had just finished reading a small book that my daughter and I came across. I was wrapped in a sumptuous down comforter watching the snow light on the landscape before me. The moon was casting mellow shadows in various shades of silver, white and blue in the grove. It was lovely! Serenity fltered through the windows into my soul and my mind began to drift.....

I thought about the days of shopping and wrapping and decorating packages that were behind me and those that were waiting ahead. I thought of the cookies and sticky buns that needed to be baked, the Honey Baked Ham that needed to be bought. I gazed out at the soft glow of the lights outlining the barn, the potting shed, and the bridge at the Hollow... all of the delightfully generous and important expressions of love and celebration that accompany Christmas. I love it all! I love every minute that's packed with too much to do.

But, I was reminded that as happens so often, if we are not careful, the symbols can overwhelm the symbolized. Perhaps the pretty presents, the twinkling trees, the glittering decorations need to be separated from the more quiet, more personal moments when I let my thoughts become centered on Bethlehem and the myriad reasons to be grateful for the events, and the people of that night.

As a mother who eagerly prepares for visiting children, covering the beds with billowy comforters and pillows and spreading the table with an abundance of delicacies to be eaten and enjoyed, I found my thoughts drifting to the aching heart of a husband who didn't have even the means of furnishing a clean place for his beautiful bride to give birth. I know what lengths my husband would have gone to to assure that I had sterile sheets, an attentive nurse and a skilled physician at my moment of delivery. How heavy Joseph's great heart must have felt when without the helping hand of a friend, or a kinsman in sight, he made his way through the streets of a city not his own. He had no one to help him make the way easier for Mary. I wonder what thoughts he had as they were turned away from the door at the inn. What was he feeling as he tried to find the cleanest straw, and gather it into a resting place to lay his wife? What emotions were throbbing in his throat as he held the animals at bay? After she had walked, or ridin in great discomfort for approximately a hundred miles, was it wrong for him to wish some comfort for her? And Mary, as she held her newborn son, how much did she know of what lay ahead for him..how inextricably the birth and death of this small child were intertwined? Bethlehem cannot be separated from Gethsemane, or the hasty flight into Egypt from the slow journey to the summit of Calvary. It's of one piece...one story. Did she know? When she softly placed her lips on his hair and whispered her first words to him, did she know? Were her tears of overwhelming joy at his arrival tinged with sadness at what waited in his future for him? There were so many sacrifices made that night as Joseph and Mary's feet carried them into unwelcome and unwelcoming territory.

For this reason, I need to remember the very plain scene, even the poverty, of a night devoid of tinsel, gay wrappings, or goods of this world. When I reflect on the tender care given to a young girl by her frightened husband, burdened with the responsibility of bringing her child into the world safely, when I let my mind soak in the web of emotions felt by the mother of the babe in the manger, I am dumbstruck by the gifts that were laid at my feet that night. Only when I envision that unadorned birthplace and ponder on the mission of the Child born in a stable in Bethlehem will I truly understand why "Tis the Season to be Jolly" and know why the giving of gifts is so appropriate... our little gifts serve as loving, selfless reminders of his loving, selfless, majestic, redeeming gift.

My wish for the New Year is that my reflections on a starry night long ago will not be forgotten and tossed aside with the ribbons and tree and Christmas cards from distant friends. I hope to always stand in awe and carry a grateful heart for the strength and beauty of the people of the Nativity.

Happy Ever After to all who drop by... and those who don't.