Monday, March 23, 2009

I think about it often, but

I think about it often
And I'd post here everyday
But there's so very little
That seems worthwhile to say

It either rains, or doesn't rain
It's either hot, or cold
The news is all uninteresting
Or else it's all been told.

What can I say... That's exactly what my thoughts are.

It's not that my life has been boring. It's just been...
how do I say it? Even...running smoothly...no ups and
downs, no roller coaster rides. My mind has been at rest.
I haven't been wondering about the secrets of the universe
the way I so often do. I haven't been looking for that
elusive "more" that regularly seems to nibble at my contenment.
For the moment, I seem to be wrapped up snuggly in all I've
ever wanted.

I suppose there are things out there that I would wish for...
my sons to have women to love and to love them being the primary
thing that comes to mind. But, I do know that isn't something
I'm going to be able to furnish them with. They are bright,
generous, witty, hardworking, honest and handsome men. They
are the jewels in my crown and they bring their father and me
such joy. When they visit the Hollow the hillsides and rafters
ring with laughter. There are cuddles on the couches, and hefty
appetites to be satisfied. Milk, fruit, eggs and cookies, seem
to consistantly and constantly disappear. They love working and
playing side by side with their father, and my heart swells when
I see them enjoying one another's company so completely.

So... even though I know that they are a little lonely now... I
also know that they will eventually find mates to share their futures.
That no longer is the worry to me that it once was. I will always pray
for companionship for them and I still wish on the occasional star for
them, but, I no longer obsess.

So, life is even, running smoothly, and my mind is at rest. There
just doesn't seem to be anything pressing to write about.

Know that you're thought about, respected, loved and appreciated.

18 comments:

Great Grandma Lin said...

welcome back after a toooo loooong absence. we like to read about you even if everything is okay maybe especially if everything is okay. thanks for taking time to check back in...you were missed lots.

Jo, a retired teacher said...

I've been wondering where you've been. I'm happy to know that you are just content.

I enjoy reading your posts even if you have nothing to say.

Brenda @ Its A Beautiful Life said...

Hi Caryn,

So happy to hear from you again.... Thanks for leaving footprints on my site, and for sharing your 'restful' and contented thoughts here.

I can totally relate to your feelings .... You say it so well, "For the moment, I seem to be wrapped up snuggly in all I've ever wanted." Me too!

I LOVE having Rick home fulltime! There's a contentment to our days that I didn't quite foresee could possibly be.

Caryn, I don't think I ever told you that I printed off your comments about your own Wayne's retirement (you shared them once last fall on my site, if you recall) and how you both had enjoyed your new freedom. I used it as a plumbline for what we could anticipate. Even taped them in the back of my journal.

Unknown said...

What wonderful men you have raised and I must say we're glad to see you back in the blogging world! You have been missed. I too haven't had a whole lot to say on my blog lately although we have just had two full weeks of great family visitors. How fun it was to be able to spend time with them. I didn't take much pictures with Tessa and Bryce here so I keep bugging her to put them on her blog so I can steal them. Whoever the lucky women are that end up with your boys will also be blessed with a great mother in law!

Rambling Woods said...

I wondered when you were going to post. I'm glad that things are running well..I too hope that my daughter finds a good man to love her.....Michelle

Rambling Woods said...

Caryn commented...I have three incredible sons for your daughter to pick from. The youngest is the blonde in my last post. He’ll be 31 this May. The others are 33 and 34. If only, huh?…..

Caryn..I would be thrilled if my daughter met a young man of the quality of person that I am sure all of your sons are...if only....Michelle

Kay said...

Just knowing your sons had you for a mom I know your sons are fantastic, amazing guys! There are some lucky girls for them out there. I just know it.

I love how you said you didn't have much to say and then you said it so eloquently. You are truly gifted in your writing. Your comments are always, always so thoughtful and heartfelt! I just want you to know how much I appreciate the time and care you take with all your words.

Trina said...

That should be the goal of every woman, contentment, I'm so happy for you and look forward to the time that I too can feel it. Not that I want more, but that I want to be secure in what I do have, or secure in knowing that no matter what, everything will be ok. I guess deep down I do know that.

Deborah Godin said...

Nice to know that you are so content. That's exactly how I'll think of you until the next time you post, and hope things stay the happy same!!

Mare said...

I have missed your posts. I suffer from SSDD[ same sh**, different day]since I broke my leg and am stuck in the house...and each day is kind of like the next. That's the reason I share some of my earlier experiences that might be more interesting than what's happening today.[nothing]!!
Glad to read about your contentment. You deserve it!

Jean said...

It's good to read a new post from you, even if you claim to have nothing to say. And you know the dog Far Side cartoon on my blog, which you found hilarious? I love it, too, and I've seen the same cartoon done, but with Queen Elizabeth's face....

Sandy said...

This post is beautiful. For someone that had nothing to say, you warmed my heart just reading about the happiness of nothingness!

We are in the same place in our parenting. Remember the days when you/we thought we would never get the chance to rest? Well, I guess we did get the chance. We are fortunate to have gotten through all these years and to look at the present and take a long sigh of relief.

Great post!!!!

SandyCarlson said...

I hope they find happiness. They have among their assets a very wonderful, cool, loving mom. That counts for a lot! What a place it has in the happiness of a man and his partner.

Linda Reeder said...

What a beautiful job you did of telling us you had "nothing" on your mind! You have the talent to write about nothing and make it woderful.
A mind at rest is good to have.

Susan said...

lovely thoughts...and yes you need to write more often. Your thoughts are personal and intimate and inviting. Initially I heard rhythm and thought of Lin's poetry urgings. then I heard the rhythm of your heart and thought, "my, how brave she is." Maybe i ought to try to blog my inner rhythms and see how it turns out....Oh look...my word verification today is LATIN...perhaps that's what my inner thoughts might turn out sounding...I know they sometimes sound that way to me, too.

dellgirl said...

Hey, Caryn. I have really missed you. But, then I thought...she is probably otherwise occupied, like me. The times I HAVE BLOGGED since the beginning of the new year I almost always had to force myself to do it. There is so much else I find I must do.

Happy to see you when you can make it, thinking of you when you away.

Happy weekend.

dellgirl said...

Hi again, Caryn. I'm back - just to let you know I came by to wish you well.

Blogger needs to have a guestbook for times like these...when we are away. LOL (silly me)

Anonymous said...

Beautifully put! I often go for long spells without posting also. Sometimes it's because I have nothing to say and sometimes it's because I get obsessed with researching other things online. (Usually genealogy)